Marriage is something that’s being practiced everywhere around the world for centuries. Marriage in the Middle East seems so strange compared to a marriage in the Western world, in some ways it may be wrong. We all know the classic drill, a girl meets a guy and start to hang out, hanging out then turns to a date and then a date turns to engagement and finally, the engagement turns into a marriage. A marriage in the Middle East is actually the exact opposite, a boy makes the decision to marry so his mother seeks a bride for him, once the bride is found they immediately propose after only an hours worth of conversation. After the proposal they both start dating, going out to dinner and spending time in public, after the proposal the wedding comes along and everyone lives happily ever after. Yes, that’s how the stories of marriage are supposed to portray but why doesn’t the Middle Eastern woman ask herself “why doesn’t marriage work?” Perhaps she does ask herself that but does she actually take the time to find the answer?
The main problem with failed marriages in the Middle East is not knowing each other well enough before being bound for life.
Marriage usually is successful before the actual wedding, that is because it doesn’t feel forced, there’s no contract, no signing no living together. You have the complete liberty to do as you wish and leave when you see if things aren’t right, as soon as the contract is brought up and once you begin living with one another as a married couple, the feeling of being locked up arises. You may find yourself fighting over a messy bathroom or if your man leaves his underwear on the floor or if he’s not listening to you. Yes, men live a completely different way when alone, as for a woman, women live clean and organized lives, I shouldn’t dare generalize women but compared to most men, women are much more put together. The main question arises “How can I live with another man?”
The answer is to actually talk to him rather than cleaning after him. You should always see your man as your child, may seem odd but it actually works once you try it. If you clean up after him you’re giving him the impression that if he continues to leave his pants or socks on the floor you’ll be there to pick it right up. Don’t allow him to think that you are there to pick up after him, talk to him and tell him that you are not going to do his cleaning because last time you checked you didn’t sign up to become a cleaner. Some women may still think, “but there are requirements for becoming a wife… ” Yes, but are there requirements for becoming a husband?
Communication is key when it comes to marriage, letting your man know what kind of woman you are is the foundation of your long life together. Let’s imagine you never tell your man how you feel or how you are, imagine picking up his clothes, washing up the bathroom after him for the rest of your days living together as a married couple, not the most pleasant sight. Always remember that communication is key!
For a woman raised in the western world lets say the United States, this article may come in as an easy task or perhaps she won’t need any of this advice because she would’ve actually gotten to know her husband before marriage and decided if he was the right type to live with and share a life with.
With a woman from the Middle East, telling her to communicate with her husband about her not wanting to pick up after him sounds like a death wish.
With the modern world commencing right before our eyes with technology, we see that technology is not the only thing that’s being advanced, marriage is too. Thankfully the younger women of the Middle East are at an advantage, modern men are more open to their wives and accept their opinions, unlike the older generations’. This means talking to your husband will be that much easier.
Now, you may ask, “how can I find the right time and the right tone to talk to my husband about something I am not comfortable with?”
There are so many ways in which you could engage your husband before talking to him about your troubles, going for coffee is the quintessential place to be for a nice chat, grab yourselves some coffee, hit the nearest Starbucks and begin to engage. Perhaps some couples want a more quiet approach, a local library or a park, those are all places to be when you’re ready to tell him. Now comes the question of the tone. Start off by showing him that your not afraid and not shy, show confidence in your speech and body language, make him aware that you are not angry. Men tend to back away or lose interest with their wives as soon as they see that she is angry or upset about something.
As you talk to him get straight to the point, don’t go up and down, left and right just get to the point and for sure you’ll grab his attention.
Now you’re all set and you’ve laid out your tools and now its time to get to work.
Let’s use the example of cleaning up after your man as an example for your issue, and then you tell him how it makes you unsatisfied because once a man thinks that he has his woman ‘in the bag’ he will for sure pay complete attention to what you have to say.